New Year’s Resolutions are fabulous, if you actually follow them. Many people promise themselves that they will lose weight, or spend less money.
Here’s four common sense tips that are helpful to all, especially anyone who is divorced or is about to divorce.
First, don’t blame yourself for what happened.
It takes two to create the marriage, and it takes two to keep the marriage. Many good people come to our office each week. By far, the majority of them are decent, hard working individuals who need help. Many have worked at their marriages for years, and have attended counseling. Things still didn’t work out. That happens, but you cannot blame yourself.
Second, put the past behind and focus on the future.
Nothing good happens when you dwell on the past. Instead, focus on the future using a positive mind.
Positive thinking, as one famous author and minister said, leads to a better life and a better situation. Use your energy to build on the future, rather than reliving the past. The past is useful if you learn from it, but it serves no other purpose. Don’t let the past control your future. Think outside the box and do what’s best for today.
Third, don’t worry about things.
We all do this, and it adds nothing to our lives. Worry and fear take away so much of our energy. And neither produce any good. Give me an example of where worry has solved a problem. I see none. Even the Bible references this idea. To paraphrase, will all your worries add a single moment to your life? The answer is no.
Fourth, remember that you are responsible for your own happiness.
It lies within you. Don’t look to others to make you happy, and never think that you can buy happiness. Money is important, but it cannot buy you happiness. Instead, look within yourself and find the good. We all have it; we just don’t capitalize on it. Many famous authors have wrote about this. Dale Carnegie comes to mind. But it’s up to you to reach inside and find happiness.
So there you have it – four practical tips that will help in any situation. Make 2017 the year you apply them daily, and you will be happier with yourself and others.